This is a partial transcipt of Michelle Wolf's skit (YouTube link) on the September 19th Daily Show with Trevor Noah. All rights belong to their respective owners.

Oh, France... We all know France. It's the thing you see after London, but before you see underpants. And right now it's the center of a very heated debate.

The glistening beaches of the south of France, normally the most desired holiday destinations in Europe, ground zero for the battle over the so-called "burkini ban".

French officials are also trying to have a say about how women should dress, and several mayors in France are still refusing to allow Muslim women to wear full-body swimsuits, known as burkinis. And this comes despite a High Court ruling last Friday saying the ban is illegal. (CNN News)

It is so hard to be a woman. "You're wearing too little! You're wearing too much! You're somehow wearing both too much and too little! You're too old! You're too young! You're a prude! You're a whore! Have my baby! Give me back my son!"

Now here's what's going on. Muslim women want to wear burkinis, which is a full-body covering bikini, on the beach because culturally, that's how they feel comfortable. And by the way, let's just take a quick second to appreciate the name "burkini". Burka plus bikini?! Come on, that's beautiful! It is surprisingly hard to come up with a good combination name.

Like "cronut"! See, I know it's a combined croissant and donut, but it sounds like Crohn's disease for your nuts. [...] You can't just jam two things together and expect it to work. Like "Hiddleswift"!


Let's come back around to the "burkini ban". Why is this even happening?

Officials say this has to do with concerns over Islamic terrorism. Others say, it's islamophobia. (CNN News)

Okay, real quick. French police, let's say these women building sandcastles at the beach are terrorists. (Which they're not. Not even a little bit.) Wouldn't you want them to wear burkinis so they're easier to spot? I don't think it's the best advice to tell suspected criminals to blend in. "Hey, you know those bad guys we're supposed to be on the lookout for? Let's hide them in a sea of tits, like a Where's Waldo porno!"

The skit continues. See video linked above.